Hush Little Baby
by Griselda Banks
Summary: Oneshot. Just a little peek into the Potters' house before that fateful Halloween. Fear reigns in that house....


**Author's Note: I suppose the original inspiration for this came from the song Mockingbird, by Eminem. The chorus of that song is an alteration of the nursery rhyme song Hush Little Baby (or whatever it's called). This is my opinion of what James and Lily Potter must have felt like in the weeks before Voldy-Moldy came to call. I think my writing was a tad better by the time I wrote this one XD  
**

**Hush, Little Baby**

Harry was fussing again. It was as if the tiny boy could somehow sense the tension that his parents felt. Tonight was worse than usual. For the fifth night running, Lily sat upstairs in the nursery, absently rocking Harry in her arms as she gazed down on the lamplit street below. James was pacing again. She could hear his footsteps creaking across the boards of their bedroom floor next door. He had fallen into a rhythm, exactly the same every night. Ten paces one direction, swivel around, then pace ten steps back the other way. Somehow, they both knew it would happen at night. That was always when _he_ moved.

Lily was frightened, more frightened than she liked to admit. A cold knot twisted her stomach, only loosening when James whispered comforting words in her ear. James could make all her fear fly far away, but it always came back. Inevitably, she would find herself shivering with fright again. They hadn't set foot outside their house for nearly a month. Perhaps that had something to do with the tenseness that haunted them every moment of every day. Sirius was devoted; he came by nearly every day now. He understood. And he made the house cheery again, till Lily felt that they were simply living for the brief half-hour of every day when they could forget their fear in light of the best friend anyone could ever have.

It wasn't her death that she was afraid of. She would gladly die when the time came. She only feared for James and Harry. James would throw his life away before he would let anything happen to her, she knew, but what if something _did_ happen? What if, in some inexplicable way, James wasn't there by her side when she drew her last breath? Again, she wasn't worried about herself, or how she would feel dying alone; she worried what James might do to himself if the thought entered his head that he was to blame for not saving her. He wouldn't commit suicide; he knew how much the Order needed him. But…the thought of James sitting in this empty house, utterly alone, haunted Lily's dreams. She would wake in the night with a start, tears pouring down her cheeks and dropping into her ears. For a moment, she would despair, but then she would reach over and touch the man lying next to her in the bed, and warmth would steal back into her heart.

Lily shuddered to think of what would happen if both she _and_ James were to die. They would be together, but Harry, their only son, would be left alone. He was so pitiful, so weak, so helpless. If only she could be certain that Sirius could take him before a Death Eater harmed him, she could rest easy. Sirius was the right man to be Harry's godfather. Brave, loyal, loving, with a smile always ready on his lips. If only he was here now, then she would not have to worry. James and Sirius, the two men she esteemed most. But they weren't here to comfort her at the moment. At times she regretted how heavily she leaned on them, but all she had to do was look into their eyes, and she would know that they leaned just as heavily on her. _That's the only way we can survive these days, _Lily thought to herself, rearranging Harry's blankets. _By holding onto each other, and helping our friends along the way._

Harry let up a plaintive little cry; she suddenly realized he had been sobbing for the past few minutes. She had been so caught up in her own thoughts that she had hardly noticed him. She kissed his smooth cheek and sang him his favorite lullaby, the one that always calmed him down.

_Hush, little baby, don't say a word  
Papa's going to buy you a mockingbird  
If that mockingbird won't sing  
Papa's going to buy you a diamond ring  
If that diamond ring turns to brass  
Papa's going to buy you a looking glass  
If that looking glass ever broke  
Papa's going to buy you a little goat  
If that little goat fell over  
Papa's going to buy you a dog named Rover  
If that dog named Rover won't bark  
Papa's going to buy you a horse and cart  
If that horse and cart fell down  
I still will love you till the stars fall down_

Harry cooed in her arms, smiling toothlessly up at her. James's footsteps paused as he listened to her song, and then resumed their pacing. Lily sighed and held her child close to her heart. No matter what happened to them, no matter what was to come, she would never stop loving Harry and James.


End file.
